Francine...

T he following is a true story of a caregiver and her family in Hampshire County. The names have been changed to protect their privacy.

Francine is a dedicated caregiver for those she loves. She comes from a large tight-knit family and resides in what she describes as a "wonderful small town" in Western Massachusetts. Francine's faith-based community is in nearby Northampton, where she describes the people as warm, welcoming and well-educated. Francine's household includes herself, her husband, her disabled sister-in-law Annette, and her mother Yvonne. Francine is the primary caregiver for both Annette and Yvonne. Yvonne is no longer able to live independently and requires a significant level of assistance on a daily basis due to cognitive decline. Annette experiences physical limitations that also make it difficult for her to live independently, therefore requiring that she have a caregiver.

Yvonne's memory is impaired to the extent that she is no longer able to clearly recall recent or current events. This is very emotionally challenging for Francine, especially when her mother forgets her name! Francine must prepare all of Yvonne's meals and help with her personal care. Yvonne's failing memory often causes her to be anxious, so Francine must also offer frequent reassurance. Because she is not safe to be alone for even brief periods of time, Francine ensures that her mother has twenty-four hour care and supervision. This can be quite stressful as Francine knows that her mother will only continue to decline with time.

Francine knows that she can provide better care and attention for her mother at home than that which would be provided in a nursing home. "I feel it is a true blessing that my mother is able to be at home with me," Francine said. "Even though the caring is non-stop, I know that the time I have left with my mother is limited and because of this, it is a rewarding experience." Francine says that her faith in God, along with the thanks and appreciation she receives from her many family members, sustains her when she feels challenged. Francine also feels good when others in the community show support and tell her that she is an 'angel' for being the primary caregiver for two adults.

Francine knows that by taking care of her family members, she is setting a good example for her community. She is demonstrating to others that they, too, can be caregivers. "I am showing people that they can do this too; because this isn't forever," Francine said.

Francine is able to care for Annette and Yvonne at home because of the support she receives from Highland Valley Elder Services and the Adult Family Care program. "Highland Valley is a really good agency and the Adult Family Care program lives up to its mission of providing an opportunity for elders and disabled persons to remain at home, where families can provide the care they need," Francine shared. Francine receives a stipend in exchange for her work as a caregiver and this stipend has allowed her to quit her job so that she may be available to Annette and Yvonne to provide adequate care for them. Without the stipend, the financial burden would be too great. Francine said that although she was at first hesitant to care for both Annette and her mother, the situation has worked out very well.

Francine shared that as an older adult, she would encourage those with elderly parents or disabled family members who need care to consider the Adult Family Care program. She added, "They won't be sorry! It is a blessing and a rewarding experience to provide care for your loved one, because despite the challenges and difficulties, it's an opportunity to express how much you care and how much they mean to you."